E07 - The Ghost of Self-Sabotage

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Welcome to the Mindful Balance Mini Podcast.

If you are a woman over 40,

ready to break free from fad diets

and discover the power of balance and confidence

in your life, then this podcast is for you

and I am so happy that you are here.

I'm your host, I'm Rachel, a nutrition and mindset coach

and I'm going to break down everything you need to know

into bite-sized pieces of sustainable and realistic tips.

I wanna invite you to join me

as we explore practical strategies to stop overeating,

nourish your body, and use the potential

of your amazing brain to achieve your goals.

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on nutrition, mindset, and building healthy habits.

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Hey ladies, welcome back.

Today we're having a heart to heart conversation

on a topic that I know will resonate with so many of you.

It is about when you know exactly what you should be doing,

but you just don't.

Not because you're confused or unaware.

That's not the case we're talking about today.

It is when you know and you are still making decisions

that are opposite to what you know you should be doing.

This is the famous and evil self-sabotage

and we are tackling it today together.

If we were sipping on some coffee or herbal tea

or sitting on a comfy couch together,

this is what I would be saying to you.

So if you can relate, I've got you

and we are going to peel back the layers right now.

You know the saying, old habits die hard.

Imagine you are hiking through a dense forest

where the paths are your habits.

Some are very well traveled, they're familiar and easy, while others are overgrown and barely

visible. The second one, those are the new habits that we are trying to create,

but they are definitely not easy to walk. I love to refer to the brain as that well-meaning friend

that gives you, let's just call it, interesting advice.

I'm sure you have a friend like this, I think we all do.

She is fun to be with,

but sometimes her suggestions are a little bit,

well, let's say off.

Why not have that third slice of cake?

Or just sleep in, skip the morning walk.

She really means well trying to be a good friend,

but sometimes we need to kindly decline her invitations

and suggestions.

Now I want to introduce another term here

that I often use with my one-on-one clients,

and that term is buffering.

And no, I'm not talking about video streaming

kind of buffering, I'm going to explain that.

Buffering in this context is what we do

when faced with discomfort.

Imagine your goals as an alarm clock

that ringing persistently.

Buffering is like putting a pillow over that alarm,

muffling the sound and it's still there.

Whether it's scrolling on social media,

over indulging in food or oversleeping,

it's our way of pressing snooze on life

when we are avoiding discomfort.

I even want to suggest that some of the ways to buffer

can be as tricky as cleaning or cooking

or anything that you do because you're hiding

from some kind of uncomfortable task.

And if that sounds like procrastination almost,

then yes, it is a form of buffering

even when you do something that feels very productive.

When I was at my lowest feeling stuck in a cycle of self-sabotage, a really good friend

asked me the following questions that I am about to share with you in a second.

And they really changed everything for me.

If you take one thing from listening to this episode, I want you to be super honest with

yourself and answer the following four questions. I will, by the way, write them down in the episode

notes. So, if you don't have a way to write down right now as you listen, do not worry,

you can get them later. But please don't let this self-exploration opportunity pass because it can

be life-changing.

Question #1 - Why am I choosing comfort over progress?

I'm going to explain.

We all have our comfort zones.

Maybe it's like that old worn out hoodie that no longer looks good but oh my god, it is

so comfy.

Will you go to, let's say, a job interview wearing that?

How about to a party?

You won't.

Sometimes it's necessary to step out of our comfort zone for a bigger goal.

Question number two.

What am I afraid of?

This is such a crucial question because behind every act of self-sabotage is a shadow of

fear.

Maybe it's the fear of the unknown, of judgment or taking responsibility.

Maybe it is the fear of failure or maybe for you it is the fear of success actually.

It is super tricky.

Is it a lack of trust in your ability to actually do it?

Or maybe for some of you it's negative scenarios or feeling of being stuck are so familiar

and therefore you choose that over progress.

There are so many reasons women literally put obstacles

in front of themselves and change can happen

only with awareness and honesty.

What is really happening here?

Question number three,

what would my future healthiest self do today?

Here's a visualization that I want you to practice.

Think of yourself as the woman

who has already achieved her goals.

What would she be doing right now?

Newsflash, she is already in you

and she has all the answers you need.

I use this often when I feel overwhelmed

or confused in other areas of life.

Just asking that question,

what would my future self do,

usually helps me take the first step.

Because any action is good action

and is better than no action.

The fourth and last question I want you to ask yourself

is who is calling the shots here?

Your brain, powerful as it is,

often operates on outdated software.

But just as you'd update your phone or your computer,

it's up to us to update our mental patterns.

Who do you want to determine your future?

Do you want it to be old, outdated software,

or would you prefer to use the latest,

most reliable version you have available to you right now?

Before I leave you, here's a little assignment for you.

Tonight, when the world is quiet

and you finally have a moment with your thoughts,

I want you to revisit these four questions.

Take a notebook and write your answers,

unfiltered, whatever comes to mind,

because they might just light the new path for you.

And there we have it.

Another heart to heart is wrapped up.

I want to remind you that the journey of a thousand miles

begins with a single step, or in our case, a single thought.

Until next time, stay well, bye.

Thank you for tuning in

to the Mindful Balance podcast today.

I hope you enjoyed our conversation and find inspiration

to find your unique balance and confidence.

Remember that the journey continues on Instagram.

You can find me at Rachel Emma Nutrition.

That is one word where I share daily nuggets of wisdom

to help you reach your goals with ease.

If you love today's episode,

don't forget to subscribe to the podcast

and leave us a review.

Your feedback fuels our mission to empower more women

on their mindful balance journey.

Until next time, take care and stay mindful.

Bye.

Thank you for listening to The Mindful Balance.

The Mindful Balance is brought to you

by Rachel Emma Nutrition.

Our editing and mixing engineer is Michael Plawner.

Our theme song is Good Feelings by Bo Gleason.

The information in this podcast does not substitute

for medical or psychological advice

and is intended for educational purposes only.

Please consult a qualified health professional

regarding health conditions or concerns

before starting a new diet or health program.

Rachel Emma Nutrition LLC and accompanying websites

and social media platforms are not responsible

for adverse reactions, effects, or consequences

resulting from the use of any suggestions here in

procedures undertaken hereafter.

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